I give you…. fizzgigg.

1. The only person I have to live up to is me.
2. Killing yourself for your job only goes so far. Sometimes you have to say no to the money and yes to sanity. This does not make you a flake.
3. It doesn’t matter what sort of shit the folks around you are pulling - their bad acts do not justify your bad acts.
4. It doesn’t matter how badly your parents screwed you up - your life is your own damm responsibility.
5. Breeding does not equal sainthood.
6. I do not care about your kids. They may be special, but they do not make *you* special.
7. For every two weddings you dance at, be prepared to get dragged though one divorce.
8. One day, you will wake up on the other end of the generation gap. That’s ok.
9. You had sex. Your kids *will* have sex. There is a better than even chance that this will happen before marriage. Try to ensure that when they choose to do this, it’s for a better reason than “This will really piss mom and dad off. Wheee!”
10. Education stops when you’re dead. Not one day sooner.
11. MBNA does not make monoply money. Do not let them get you by the balls.